Wednesday, July 28, 2010

坚持。固执。不甘心。


Sometimes, you feel like there is a certain invisible force much larger than yourself pulling you in one direction. The direction of your choice. It's like pieces are beginning to fall into the right places. But just short of the finishing line, or like a pile of beautifully constructed Jenga blocks, before the final few pieces complete the whole, the beautiful formation falls apart. Yet, that strange force still pulls you in the same direction.

And you fall into a vortex of emotional turmoil. You are allowing it. You're still choosing, painfully limping on this road of uncertainty. Do you take a road of persistence, surrender, or refusal to be resigned to the hard facts that fall before your very eyes? Do you (want to) believe in the strange force?

I seek answers. I am getting none. I once said, that is why life is interesting. I guess that is what I will hold to. Like ephemeral sakuras. So precious, enjoy it. Live it, and behold every fold that opens as they float onto my palm. I like pleasant surprises. Throw away the sadness.

Friday, July 16, 2010

Deep passing thoughts


The first thing I saw this morning was an email from a dear friend informing of her father's passing. I could offer her not much but words of comfort through a long SMS, being so far away from Singapore myself. Her words offered me more food for thought, "Do not take your parents for granted." They are actually making me think twice about Shanghai. What exactly am I after?

Thursday, July 15, 2010

一年


有许多感触,也写了一篇文章却没有勇气把它放上来,就贴上这篇朋友写的一首很优美的诗来纪念这一年渡过的最高峰和最低点。也该到个段落了。

I thought I saw you in the flicker of a candle

I thought I saw you in the reflection of your tea cup

I'm sure I saw you in the words of my diary

and in the eternal breathless moment that our eyes locked

like a pair of butterflies in tandem

we were locked in the same rainbow

where nightmares die

and dreams fly

I'm letting you go ~ for now

because I have plenty more to live for

and plenty more love to give

I won't forget you and I hope you won't forget me